Bridget Tan, Helping Wholeheartedly

Last year, and a few times over the last number of years, I was involved in some productions that were put up in favour of foreign workers who were mistreated or abused. Alone in a foreign land, they were able to find solace through HOME (Humanitarian Organisation for Migration Economics). Its dedicated founder and advocate, came to our shows and touched us with her kindness, generosity and sincerity. That's the humble Bridget Lewis Tan. You can read what she wrote here about sex trafficking: http://www.onesingapore.org/news/stop-sex-trafficking/

I recall Bridget at one of our performances, relating how she wanted to give back to society by setting HOME up with her CPF savings and whatever little time she had left on Earth. She would take calls at any hour, caring for helpless workers, domestic helpers, foreign women trafficked for sex, and even foreign brides. Her sense of justice resonated with many Singaporeans. After all, a lot of us here cannot deny our forefathers' immigrant roots.

On 5th February, Bridget suffered a stroke. According to the news, she hasn't regained consciousness and is in Changi General Hospital. It is heartbreaking for many to hear this, including my "Rojak famiree", who put up a play at the Arts House twice last year entitled Rojak. Let us hope and pray for the best.

You can read more about HOME here: home.org.sg

(I'm not linking any news articles about her sudden stroke, because those are the first things presented when one does an online search for her. Also, her condition may change and we all hope it will, for the better.)

Skin for Skin!

Lots of people criticise chicken skin for being unhealthy and fatty.

I, as I always have, beg to differ. I feel that chicken skin is an amazing alternative to moisturiser and collagen.

I have a confession to make. I am really lousy at sticking to any routine. I also feel that it's a silly thing for us women to spend lots of hard-earned money on skincare, when most men hardly spend anything yet look pretty good anyway.

Well, guys may not always have the soft dewy skin and healthy glow that women seem to crave, as many magazines and advertisements suggest. But I suppose they are not expected to as well.

I imagine this could have stemmed from the distant past, when men had to work hard in the fields or at an office while a woman wasn't allowed to even apply to universities. Her duty in life was to marry a good provider, bear him children, cook, clean, make the house a home, guard the mailbox, stand by her man (poor Tammy), and in the time that's left, look pretty for him. Notice that as a wife, mother and home-maker, her duties did not include falling in love.

If one were in love, wouldn't looks be unimportant? Or are looks the first lure to falling in love? Well, I had always made it a point to go on dates without makeup and heels. Ok, ok, I admit. I am just daaaamn lazy and don't want my feet to suffer in pain and worry about my makeup running, especially if a date is meant to be enjoyable. Why should the guy get to have all the fun in his comfy shoes and his own makeup-free skin?

I also get to be myself from the start and if the other party ain't interested, that's just fine. Because as sincere and honest as I would be that day, I wouldn't put my heart on the line for a relative stranger. If the other party likes that and I enjoyed their company, then things can only get better from there! That's almost like telling some of the story within the pages of a book before you reveal its glossy colourful cover.

Anyway, back to the skin. Muahahaha... I suppose I should start with a proper skincare regime now. Better late than never, they say. Everytime I hear the word "regime", I think of the military. Wonder what I read as a child. I am never disciplined enough to follow a, well, regime, so I never kept to any product or routine. Oh, except maybe shampoo, soap, a toothbrush and toothpaste. I used to condition my hair once a fortnight when it gets really dry and tangled. Now I'm reminding myself to condition my hair just before it gets to that bramble stage.

Eating my favourite food, however, requires no reminding or stress. It relieves stress and gives me joy! It also provided collagen enough to keep my skin from looking like crushed paper. I may scrape off the fat sometimes if I feel too full (though I am never too full for skin). But I guess I could safely say this:

Skin saved my skin!

Rebates or Points?

Today I am thinking of buying something on rakuten singapore. Many things are currently on sale and to add to the nudge is a S$15 off a minimum purchase of $50.

After the discount, you would be paying S$35 but they will still give you points for your purchase at 1 point per dollar spent. Which means you still get 50 points for your $35 purchase! There's also free shipping now for different deals and amounts.

Now if you also use mastercard for your purchase, you will get 10 times the number of points usually given. So your $35 purchase would give you 500 points, equivalent to $5 which can be used to b a future product. Points will be credited about 7 or so days after the purchase.

But from what I read online, it seems you cannot use the points to partially pay for a single item. So if i wanted to buy a $6 item in future, I cannot use my 500 points (or $5 credit) and just pay $1 using my credit card. It has to be an item that is $5 or less. And I won't know when these promo points expire till I get them.

I also have the personal option of paying with the OCBC frank card which gives me a 6% rebate off online purchases (minimum spend of S$500 online). This works out to S$2.10 rebate for a S$35 purchase.

Which would you choose?

I would normally go for the rebate since I don't know if I will buy anything on the site again. That said, they are giving new sign ups $10 credit which you can use by entering a code (one can use one code per bill so I would recommend the cny $15 discount which expires tonight!). So I might return to get some ramen or something if they offer free (conditional) shipping again.

I also am forgetful so I might lose my credit as I did with groupon. I just discovered I lost $20 credit from refunds etc which expired in 2012. Oh well. Haha!

So, which would you choose?

Wedding: Marriage Preparation Course

We have registered ourselves in the marriage preparation course (MPC for short). The brochure stated that the course hopes to curb the rising rate of breakdowns in marriages because young couples "ride on their feelings of love, which eventually fade as problems start to emerge".

It's a 6 week course, comprising of 3 half-day Sunday sessions at a common location and 3 half-day sessions on weekends at the homes of the couples who I believe are presenting, or conducting, the course.

I wonder if the MPC is compulsory here. I wonder if lots of couples forego this if they could. I also wonder if some wished for a course like this, not knowing it exists.

As a relatively older bride (haha), I am quite certain I know what I would be like as a wife. Thankfully, my fiancé is also older (and wiser, one would hope), having experienced love, loss, fear, pain, arrogance and humility.

But how will we solve issues together? We honestly haven't had fights or major disagreements. However I'm sure there are some important topics to explore.  Something to look forward to in July. :)

Wedding: When Again?

Yet another date change.

Now its September 6th. After my fiancé's mom consulted the Chinese zodiac and calendars online, she decided that September 6th was a more auspicious date.

So now after finally getting 3 (York, Peninsula Excelsior & Riverfront) out of about 30 hotels to reply my emails and calls positively (yes, the 27 or so I contacted are booked up on October 18th), I am going to badger all of them again regarding the 6th of September.

Some are hearing from me a third time since I asked many about the 11th of October initially. I haven't even called to check with the church!

52 Saturdays in a year. How does one choose? Sigh...

Wedding: Auspicious Dates

Looks like we have to change our wedding date. Heh.

It's been fun yet stressful thinking about the wedding on October 11th 2014. We set that with the church. However, after my fiancé's mom checked with a geomancer regarding the dates in September and October, we ought to follow these auspicious dates and times, according to our birth dates and times. The photo in this post features the dates written by my fiancé's mom on the back of an old calendar page. So cute.

We aren't superstitious actually but it's fine to change our dates and we want to please our parents. They did a lot of us raising us and though my dad won't be there, I have decided to make a small little video to sort of share his legacy with our guests. Gotta be careful not to be too indulgent there. My pragmatic brothers will keep me in check.

Settling on a date was easy. The church only held weddings on Saturdays. Fiancé dear wants to have the wedding only in October. So... drumroll... it's gotta be October 18th 2014! He was also amused at the fact that our initially chosen date was only auspicious for 3 hours. :)

Now I had no idea october 18th 2014 was so popular. Every hotel and restaurant contacted has that date booked already! And I emailed and called at least 20. I wonder if we can hold a nice dinner for our guests then. Maybe we have to consider venues like the exhibition halls or restaurants in far corners of the island. Even though it's still an island, the traffic and the distances locals are accustomed to will usually present these places as "wa so far and ulu ah?"

Well, let's hope something opens up or we find a couple who needs to let go of their dinner on October 18th 2014. Fingers crossed!

Where & When?

Well, we set a date. But it's still open to discussion since my fiancé's mom has yet to see the geomancer. My mom isn't bothered with auspicious dates. My fiancé and I are happy either way. So we'll just wait for the date. No sweat.

The date, however, is a necessary piece of information to present before we can confirm our venue.

Which brings us to the question of where...

I was very keen on this beautiful ballroom. It evokes a sense of grandeur, fairytales and magic. As if anything is possible that night and everyone has been transported to a majestic palace, the sort you only read about in fantasy novels.

It isn't up my mother's alley though because she feels it's very inconvenient for most people. Sigh... here it is, my dream ballroom which will remain just that, a dream.

Photos here pulled from the Orchid country club website and some bridal forums. Won't you fall in love here as well?